Monday, September 15, 2008

Thigh Highs and Other Self-Starters

It's amazing how having a fifteen year old daughter who is on the cusp of discovering her own sensuality/sexuality makes you step back and take a look at your own. It's also amazing how so much of these discussions begin because the girl is once again pilfering in your damn closet.

Okay, so I'm downstairs in my office writing and from above I hear, "Mom, just how many thigh high pairs of boots do you own?"

Damn! Why can't this girl stay out of my stuff? If I find one more post-it stuck to something saying, 'Sorry, I'll get this fixed' or 'I'll get you a new one,' my son is going to be an only child, but that's a different post.

So I take the stairs two at a time, not an easy feat on a spiral staircase, but the need for speed is great because frankly, tall boots make great storage space for other things, (if you know what I mean) and I'm just not in the mood to tackle a discussion on things that go buzz in the night. I get to my closet and thank goodness, she's not ventured into the trying on stage.

"Why are you in my closet?"

"Why do you need three pairs of *thigh high boots? You're old."

I wanted to tell her to kiss my loving ass, but I don't because apparently you aren't suppose to say those kind of things to your children, but I damn sure screamed in my head--hard and loud. I didn't bother to tell her that I've had some of those boots nearly as long as I've had her because that only seemed to go to her 'you're old' argument. Nor did I tell her that at 50, I too had begun to question whether I was too old to wear such fashion, but that after seeing style expert Lloyd Boston's appropriately fabulous mother (I interviewed him for a magazine article and she was there)who well into her sixties was rocking some thigh high suede boots, I knew I could still hang.

So I told her the truth, "Because I like them."

Apparently after she was denied access to them and any other pair of my shoes (I'm still waiting for her to have the heels fixed on one of my favorite pair that she broke while practicing her America's Next Top Model stroll) she lost interest and went back to her world, leaving me in my closet trying on my old friends.

My legs and feet are my other best features. Yeah, boobs,legs and feet. (It's all the other stuff in between that gets a little shaky, but I digress.) So as every WMS should do, I tend to wear things that play them up. My skirts hit me in the right place, usually 1 to 3 inches from the knee and I always wear heels, which make them look longer give them nice definition.

And one day I discovered thigh high stockings. As with most things, I stumbled on the stockings and their sex appeal. Years ago, I decided to try them because I absolutely hate pantyhose. They are constricting and they always add another roll around my middle--the last thing my six pack abs(of jello) needed. So fast forward, I put them on with a cocktail dress and at one point in the evening my skirt flipped revealing the top of the stocking. Let's just say my husband's reaction was telling...and I liked it. They brought out my bad girl and made me feel daring and bold AND they solved my pantyhose issue. SEXY and awesome combination!

Well, natch, the boots followed. They cause the same reaction and the wonderful thing is they do so with whatever I am wearing. Whether I wear the flat pair with a tunic and leggings or the heels with the tops hiding under my skirt hem only to reveal a little skin when I sit, I get a positive reaction and that makes me feel great. But it really doesn't matter if nobody notices because I do and act accordingly.

So the moral of this story is: Find what makes you feel good and daring and sexy and rock it. But don't necessarily LOOK for them, sometimes the best things FIND you. Be in tune with yourself and recognize when something flips the switch and then own the look and work it. And it doesn't have to be anything overtly sexy, just something that is sexy to you. This way they become authentic props to your sensual self and not something you put on (come on, say it with me now) you want to PLAY sexy.

Oh, and the other truth to this story: Don't let any young thing, even if she does belong to you, question your feminine confidence. Remember: they may have the shiny and new equipment, but don't have the slightest idea what to do with it. It's the seasoning that comes with a little wear and tear that really makes a woman sexy--even if she can tuck her boobs in her thigh high boots!

What do you think?


Brandi said...

I'm impress. I've always been intrigued by thigh highs but seeing as to how I have a hard enough time finding tall boots to fit over my calfs, thigh highs are so not gonna happen.

The idea of clothes being "age appropriatre" is as dated as not wearing white in winter.
You wear what makes you feel good!

Anonymous said...

I love a good laugh and that's just what this article gave me! You are too funny. I am 51 and my daughter is 28 and she thinks I am nasty because I do seminars on sexual relationship stuff! Too bad for her but I understand. I totally agree with you on the SEXY thigh high. My legs are one of my best assets, (or use to be before the cellulite purchased my skin and started calling it home), and I love the way thigh highs wear. What I love more is fishnets (which my hubby says makes him immediately think hooker). They not only make me look sexy but also make me feel sexy. I haven't worn them since that comment but reading your article made me rethink the situation. I have pinpointed a dress to wear and use the fishnets as an "accessory". Afterall, we have to be ourselves and know what we love and not let others dictate us to, us. BTW, I think the real problem is that I get too much attention from other men when I wear them. :D