Tuesday, May 29, 2007

What I Learned from Carrie Bradshaw

Despite what many TV Watch groups think, you can learn a lot from TV--even when the show you're watching is, on the surface, about the fabulously, frivolous things in life--shoes, purses, cocktails--and always the men for good or bad, we love and lust after.

I don't think there are many WMS who haven't seen at least one episode of the pop culture classic, Sex in the City. That show was the program that gave the concept of being a woman who lives her own truth wings. It was our Star Trek, daring to go where no man had gone before to explore the female psyche.

Each one of those characters was flawed and fabulous, each had her own unique idea of what was right and wrong for her. Samantha wanted to be an full-out sex goddess, and she was. Charlotte wanted to be an uptown society wife, and she was. Miranda wanted to be it all--superlawyer/supermom, best friend, and she was. Carrie wanted to explore and discover and enjoy herself and her life as it unfolded, and she did. Each was sexy and interesting in her own way.

They each lived their personal version of life with no apologies. Oh sure, there were often consequences for some of their decisions--they got their hearts broken (and broke a few themselves)--but they weren't afraid of living and loving full out accepting the sunshine with the rain, the joy that was sometimes laced with pain. They were quintessential Weapons of Mass Seduction who were fearless and confident--even when they had to fake it until they make it.

Carrie was the one I most related to. Probably because she was a writer and loved shoes and kind of flew by the seat of her fancy pants. And when it came to men, she definitely did not have a type. Millionaire or carpenter, struggling novelist or world renown artist, Carrie went with the flow, falling in love with who was sexy and interesting to her at the moment. I saw myself in her struggles and her joy.

So, what should I have learned from Carrie Bradshaw and why am I even bringing up a show that hasn't filmed a new episode in years? Well, remember the episode when Carrie's hard drive died? She lost everything, all of her columns and other parts of her life that were chronicled on her computer. It killed her because, you see, for writers, our computers are the scrapbooks and journals of our lives. Photos, files, emotions, ideas, secrets--everything is stored there. That hard drive represents our livelihood, our passions, our loves, our past, present and future.

So like Carrie, I lost everything on my hard drive last Thursday, the day before my birthday. Like Carrie, I hadn't backed up my stuff (long story, too long to get into here). And like Carrie, I wrapped my baby up and took her to the computer doctor, who sadly informed me that they'd done all they could but everything was lost, including the latest version of my next book (good news, a friend had a copy and sent it to me!).

So, last week, I spent my birthday on Friday through the Memorial Day weekend, in a Silver Patron daze. I gave myself a combination pity/birthday party and refused to be upset by the fact that years of work and memories were lost. Then today I sobered up and tried to find the lesson behind this.

Here's what I came up with: The past is lost but I have every ability to build anew and create from scratch the next chapter of my life. Nothing is written in stone. I have a new hard drive in an existing body and with the wisdom and experience behind me, I am gifted with the thrill and excitement of writing my future.

So that's what I learned from Carrie Bradshaw from Sex in the City. Be fearless. Be fabulous and true to myself. Own my truth. Live my life. Love my loves, write the journey down and back that sucker up every which way I know how!

Maybe what you can learn from my experience and the SITC girls revolves around the idea of a new hard drive in an existing body. Sometime life through divorce, death, boredom, and/or personal growth forces you to wipe your slate clean. And all you can do is insert a new attitude into your life as it exists and proceed forward--fearless and confident (with your signature cocktail in hand, of course!).

What do you think?


Anonymous said...


I agree with your sentiments; especially since most women tend to be "collectors" of a sort - we like to hold on to people, places and things; even memories, etc. that represent where we were in the past. But who are we now? What are we becoming? It's good to let it all go once and a while - like the old saying: "God can only fill an empty cup" - so that something new and fresh can come into our lives. Thanks for the reminder!

Anonymous said...

It's SEX AND THE CITY. Good post.