Thursday, February 14, 2008

Live Love

Happy Valentine's Day! I sincerely hope that this day is full of love and happy, wonderful feeling for all of you.

Today has been put aside for love and I hope you will use the opportunity to really and truly fall in love with yourselves. Let this be the beginning of your new 'love' year resolution to become the best lover you can possibly be.

Whenever I give a workshop, I ask people to raise their hand if they think they are good lovers. Of course nearly every woman in the room raises her hand, often with a nervous chuckle because hey, who doesn't want to believe that they can drop it like it's hot. But when I ask how many are great lovers outside the bedroom, with all their clothes and various body parts in their proper places, suddenly they're not so sure because if they were indeed good lovers, wouldn't they have a man? Wouldn't their marriages feel more intimate? Wouldn't they feel better about themselves?

In my writing classes, I tell students that much of the work of writing a novel comes way before you ever sit down to type the words, once upon a time. The same is true of creating a great love life. Much of the work of being a memorable lover begins way before you ever hit the sheets and it all begins with your attitude about love.

When it comes to love too many of us are satisfied simply experiencing love as a state of mind. We allow love to dwell in our hearts and heads and fuel this emotion with love songs, poems and romance novels. We extend our feelings to only those 'lovers' we deem acceptable and worthy--spouses, children, parents, siblings,friends--and exclude those who don't fit neatly into our heart-shaped box.

Expand your loving state of mind and make it your quest to exist in a loving state of being. Extend the boundaries of your acceptable 'lovers' and fill your world, not just your mind, with loving thoughts and actions. A smile, a thought, a good deed towards a stranger is a good way to start. Be a friend instead of a competitor. Accept and return a compliment with a genuine smile. Ask not what your lover can do for you, but what you can do for your lover!

The only way to receive love is to give it. The only way to be blessed with quality love is to offer quality love in return. You get back what you give.

LIVE love. And remember on this Valentine's Day, a day of self-pity and angst for many, it's not always about WHO you love, but rather DO you love.

What do you think?

Okay...I've exhausted politics and this holiday of hearts topic. Next week I'm going to tackle the subject of many emails I've received over the (you know what kind of toys!) So pull on your big girl panties, we have lots to discuss! Did you know they have one that looks like a lipstick? Stay tuned.

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